’ ‘Barbara, I’m really inhibited about doing that in your mouth. It seems almost obscene. . .’ ‘No, no, it’s fun sometimes. Besides, dear, even if I won’t have a committed relationship with you, I know sex with you and love making with you is special for me, and I want it to be special for you, too, and better with me than with anyone else. ‘And, Joe dear, you have some unfinished business with me right now. You can use that vibrator, or whatever part of you is still working, but right now I’m climbing walls. . .’ I leaned over her. ‘I want to watch, too,’ she muttered, slipping a pillow under her head and leaning forward, legs spread, pelvis tilted up, watching. I opened her, licked her, telling her that when she was going down on me I wanted another penis to be in her, until she, too, couldn’t help herself. Barbara’s orgasms are not quiet and subdued. She convulses, giving me as much pleasure in driving her over the edge as she gets being driven over. Then we slept, and awoke. Not much else seemed important.He finished cleaning up. It was early in the evening and he wasn't sure what to do. He wanted to go somewhere with a crowd. He felt like he could be around people again, for a while. He had two hundred dollars, counting what he had taken from the dead man. Despite living on the streets, he didn't have a hard time keeping cash on hand anymore. There was less to spend it on.He went into the first bar he found. The smell of so many warm human bodies in an enclosed space made him nervous, but he sat down anyway, ordering a beer he couldn't drink. The room was full, and he felt like people were staring. He supposed even after cleaning up he must look like a mess, still pale and shaking. They probably think I'm crashing on something, he thought.He watched the crowd, flat faces and dull eyes under dim yellow lights. Their movements looked stiff and jerky, their flesh waxen, voices sounding scratched and hollow like an old record. For some reason, it didn't.
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